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Mar 13, 2012

FAT Tuesday Begins in 12 hours!

 Well folks, the greatest NFL off-season event is about to take place as teams begin to shape themselves up for the upcoming season. I am talking about the FAT - Free Agent Tuesday. Starting at 4 p.m., teams can offer contracts to players not bound by their current (or recently former) team. Last year, due to the NFL lockout, free agency was cut short by several months and when it opened up finally, the Eagles opened up their pocket books and manpurses to buy themselves the best 8-8 team of ALL time.

Now, hopefully the Eagles have calmed down. The most coveted prized free agents around the league are not necessarily needed by the Eagles but rather wanted by the city of Philadelphia. For any true Eagles fan to say they are happy with the current team, well, you would not be a real Eagles fan. First, you have to realize the state of the team, and that no matter what you wanted at the end of last season (or seasons past for that matter), we are stuck with who we are stuck with. I am going to provide my general thoughts on the upcoming FAT Tuesday, regardless of how it woud benefit the Eagles or not. Also, please be advised that I have no experience playing football, I do not follow college football and am clueless on draft day (aside from the big names), and I have been whoopified the past couple years in fantasy football.

So, now that the disclaimers are done, without further aduba, I present to you:

Duba's Misguided Free Agent Thoughts

Peyton Manning (or more like the Colts) turned this free agent period into a one man show. Even if Vincent Jackson signs on to the Patriots and delivers a baby while rescuing orphans and puppies from burning buildings while being shot at by terrorists along the way, people would still be talking about Manning. And why not? If you read this far you already know who he is. So, where do I think he will end up? I think that he would best be served in Arizona. The Cardinals can let Kolb go into oblivion and use his money to pay for Peyton. Manning to Fitzgerald all season long, while tutoring John Skelton? And increasing the running game for Beanie Wells at the same time? And the Cardinals could maybe trade Kolb away to get some defense back. Cleveland is desperate and they had one of the best pass defenses in the league last year the Cardinals can pillage from. I am shocked to hear that the Broncos are strong contenders. Where's your messiah now, Tebow? I think he is in Miami, returning home after his visit with your team. I think health wise, exposed to the mile high environment in a potentially brutally cold climate could tweak the injuries of the older Peyton. Which would make Miami an excellent choice. They have improved their run game and have a solid defense. They also have a decently talented core of receivers that could grow if Reggie Wayne comes by. However, I saw Chad Henne do well given his circumstances and then Matt Moore proceed to improve as well. Without their soft former head coach to run them back into the ground, the Dolphins could have a decent chance on their own. Plus, who would not want to see Manning-Brady two times a year?

Man, I have gone on quite a bit so far, more than my normal four sentence maximum detail I usually provide on anything. It is just that Peyton is the biggest deal in this quarterback driven league right now. If he goes to Denver, Tebow is up for grabs and the new Jacksonville owner is not shy about ponying up for him. If he goes to Arizona, Kolb would most likely be released prior to his bonus. Where can he go after his second consecutive "meh" anticipated season? Some old Eagles staff he worked with are in Cleveland and he supposedly knows that offense. Maybe San Francisco, Seattle, or Miami could use him. If Miami grabs him, that leaves Henne or Moore to stay with the team. Moore would probably stay and get to learn from the best and be a serviceable backup in case he goes down, which may lead to Henne taking his wild arm elsewhere, maybe Jacksonville, Cleveland, or elsewhere. The Titans want Manning? Have fun with an average quarterback age of 45 with Matt Hasselback there. That would be dumb and I do not support any more thought on it. Texans? They have Matt Schaub, who had a bad year and was injured, as were several of his key weapons. Houston does not need Manning as the division is theirs for at least the next two years.

Please note, I strongly believe that if the Ravens found a way to get Peyton Manning, they would go on to be the Greatest Team of All-Time (if he stayed healthy).

Overall, I go with Arizona, Miami, or Denver, in that order of preference and what I believe would be best. If Peyton were to go down for the final career count on one of these teams, there are at least young players behind him who he can mentor.

Vincent Jackson - In a pass happy league, so many teams have shitty receivers. Cleveland. San Francisco. Chicago. The Jets. Even the Patriots. I think V-Jax is tired of waiting to win. He probably saw how close the Patriots were last year and wants at least the chance to get there, something he has seen pass him by in San Diego. Sigh, although now the experts are saying that since the Redskins have assured themselves a franchise quarterback that V-Jax would be a perfect fit for. He could not find a rhythm all year with his quarterback Phillip Rivers who he has played with for years now. I hope he goes to Chicago instead, as Jay Cutler and the Bears have nothing to throw to. For a couple years now. I say, he goes with Chicago.

Michael Bush - He filled in quite admirably for the annually injured Darren Mcfadden. Signs show that the Bengals could use him to replace the free agent Cedric Benson. He only has 24 more hours to commit a crime though unless the Bengals are looking to turn a new leaf. Bush should say "eff-it" and go replace Benjarvus Green Ellis on the Pats. I personally think Bush needs a starting role. Maybe he is what Cleveland needs in their fourth attempt at rebuilding since that once good Derek Andersen season years ago. I do think he would be a fit with the Bengals as I cannot think of another team that really needs somebody like him, minus maybe the Chargers.

One of the best defensive ends, Mario Williams, should stay with the Texans. They should keep that team together since they did so well with so many injuries, advancing in the playoffs and more or less hanging with the Ravens in the next round. Williams was not part of the playoffs, but if he was maybe they would have gone farther. Hard to tell, as the Patriots controlled the AFC destiny. A lot of teams could use a decent pass rusher like him, but I really think he should stay in Houston. It would be a second year in the Wade Phillips system plus the core of the team is preserved a little longer. He is probably going to go out for money and potential success. I have a bad feeling we may see a Redskins helmet on Williams in the future. Sorry, I am not too up on teams' defensive needs.

Now the quick thoughts:

Matt Flynn - It all depends on Peyton Manning. If he is in Miami, Flynn will probably go to Cleveland (since they did not pursue RG3). If Manning goes to Denver, Flynn could be either Cleveland or Miami bound, and that depends on Kevin Kolb. If Manning becomes a Cardinal, then Flynn will definitely be a Dolphin and Kolb will be a Brown and his "coulda-been" career dies a little quicker.

Brandon Jacobs - The most pissed off and disgruntled two-time Superbowl winner I have ever seen. I always thought Jacobs should be the best and most feared running back in the NFL. The only fear he strikes is in dealing with an attitude issue as he is clearly a little insane. He is proud to have jawed with Rex Ryan and wants to play for him now. He would have to be a backup, but a decently involved backup. I would love for him to be an Eagle, but he is most likely going to be a Jet. Which frees the Eagles up for...

Mike Tolbert - Younger than Ronnie Brown (who if he was given better opportunities I think could have been a real difference maker - sometimes it is the play calling and not always the player's fault), he has proven capable in his time in San Diego. He is the bruiser the Eagles need. Tolbert would have to be a backup, but a high profile one. However, with the mess in Cleveland, I can see them taking a full-time chance on him, and letting Tolbert and Hillis push each other all season.

Peyton Hillis - Yeah, there is probably some news out there about him that I forgot. He can be awesome and should be a bulldozer. What he did last season was forgettable and now he may be in limbo. He should stay in Cleveland, as I believe some help may be on the way there, one form or the other.

Brandon Lloyd - Since he apparently only can play for Josh MacDaniels, I, too, believe that he will become a Patriot. And he would be cheaper than Vincent Jackson.

Wes Welker - Yeah, he may have cost his team a Superbowl, but how is he still playing? I mean, the only advantage he has over me is he is a litte faster. Whoopity shit. If he goes anywhere else, that coach will try to do cute things with him on the field that will lead to disaster and injury for Welker. That is why he will remain in New England, on the cheap for a #1 wide receiver, and live out his last 2 good years there.

That is all I can muster up in terms of players I know anything about off the top of my head. I know there are some decent centers and linemen out there, and some older linebackers and safeties. I skipped Reggie Wayne intentionally. What really could he have? He is like Tonto to Peyton's Lone Ranger. Nobody really needs him except maybe Seattle, Cleveland, Kansas City, or Saint Louis.

Instead, my remaining football knowledge comes in the form of me seeing a player's name, then the position, and then remembering his former team's success and failure compared to the new team and THEN I realize the impact.

All in all, I hope the Eagles address the needs they have. I hope they just do not go with a bunch of aging player to rotate around as linebackers and safeties with the added intention of finding a bargain player in the draft. We also need a bruising tall receiver, and that Blackmon kid may be the one, but you already have two number one receivers on your team plus a great tight end. Plaxico Burress may just be what the doctor ordered as Andy Reid may want to help the rehab of yet another player. Cedric Benson has officially been to jail and is a free agent, so maybe we get him too.

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