So last night, I had the displeasure of watching the Eagles after one of the longer days of work I have ever had. Kim and Rocco went out to eat with her mom and arrived home after I did, around 8. We read some books and I joined the game in progress immediately following the Damaris Johnson muffed punt. What. The. Hell.
The following is a chronological portrayal of comments I had made on Facebook while watching the game/texting my best football buddy Brandon in BOLD type. Immediately underneath is my quick explanation. Enjoy...
Let's go eagles get into that massive road trip with a winning record!
The Eagles have one of the mo,re difficult schedules. They just wrapped up three games in 11 days and head out to Denver for the next one. I think they have the Giants and somebody else I can't remember on the road. That's three straight road games, 4 in the first 6 weeks. At least when they return half of their away games will be done. Denver may find themselves in a trap game if the Eagles take the next 10 days to prep like they did for Week 1.
What the fuck eagles. I've been up since 310 this morning for work to make a fraction of what your lowest paid teammates make. I did my job well. Do yours. Dicks.
Ah. This was when the Chiefs intercepted Vick and scored on the same play. Nobody did much to stop that play or let it develop. I feel after three weeks this offense feels entitled to scoring points and doesn't earn them yet.
That's right Andy, establish the punt!
A few years ago Jay invited me Brandon and Landis to a game. I believe it was Donovan McNabb's return to Philadelphia after being traded to the Redskins. We sat amongst season ticket holders in the end zone. Some were hilarious, some were drunk. Some were both. This guy, who's name I never got, appeared near death at one point in his seat. Landis nudged me and told me to look at the guy next to Brandon is perhaps about to puke. The dude was like a taller Brandon. We don't think he was even watching the game since kick-off. We went for a smoke break and I volunteered to sit next to him as I was the smaller statured one. He muttered a bunch of awesome sayings. Including him just yelling at the top of his lungs every defensive play, "HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" until the play was complete. The Eagles were full of 3 and outs that day, and every time the punting unit came, the dude would whisper to me, "That's it Andy, establish the punt. You can't get the game going if you don't have a strong punting game. Establish the punt. You have to establish the punt. All game. Establish the punt." His words resonate with me this day and I wish my late friend was still here to share this tale with me.
Every other actor in the world, 1 - Joe Flacco, 0
Immediately following said punt, they cut to commercial. The commercial was for Colin K-somethingorother and Joe Flacco having a football tossing competition and then something about MacDonalds new mighty wings. The lights go out in the stadium and some creature is eating the wings. I hope it turns out to be King Dunlap, but they never reveal who/what it is. Anywho, Joe Flacco will be a horrible actor. He is like if a chalkboard had human features, that's Joe Flacco. Plus, he looks like he has a clear mask on over his face. He just looks weird. Keep it to mediocre regular season play, Joe.
After Vick runs for like 60 yards you can't fake hin running.
Seriously, nobody on the Chiefs bought that Vick was going to keep it after his first long run in the second quarter. McCoy got no gain on that play and perhaps it could've been a pass or straight up simple hand-off.
Mike Mayock sounds like he wants to analyze the locker room more than the game, but he's a great commentator.
He sounds like he enjoys the company of men more than women. Nothing wrong with that as I have stated before in my forum to the world. He provides really good information about the players' past and perhaps what they may be good at. He is good at analyzing the plays. And remember, you can't spell analyze without anal.
You're crushing their line. Just demolish them already
I don't even think it would be considered crushing the line. More like just busting through it. 3-5 players seemed like they were getting back there, almost grabbing Alex Smith and also keeping Jamaal Charles to 15 rushing yards up till the 4th quarter.
Establish the punt!
Please see aforementioned story.
This game has a high visor to coach ratio.
I saw Doug Peterson and Chip Kelly and some additional assistants on both sidelines with visors. The visor is a weird look. Some people look like gamblers, some look like arrogant douchebags. Some look like child molesters. I don't know which category Chip falls into yet.
Love the fact that flyeaglesfly.com created by Tim Beitz gets so much play
My oldest friend on the planet, of 28+ years, Tim Beitz, had a major part in development of the Philadelphia themed flyeaglesfly.com. The commercials always seem to air in the 2nd quarter of NFL network games. You go boy. Whatever this brings you, you deserve it.
Also, in my fantasy league, I declared Tim would be the only guy that we would all choose to bang if we had to. Everybody agrees.
Laces out!! Finkle is Einhorn!
Another week, another 3 points shy of something. This past Sunday the game would've been tied and led to overtime. Last night, combined with Vick not throwing a pick six, the game is tied at the end of regulation. And if you watched Ace Ventura when you were younger, you cannot help but mutter one of these two phrases when you see a missed field goal.
Alex Flanagan is an empty headed tunnel.
Have you seen this woman on NFL Network? She is made up of 0% emotion and 100% image of what NFL Network Executives think we want to see on TV. I like football. I like the emotion of the game that comes from players and fans. I don't need the camera to zoom in on a vapid cheerleader smiling while my team is down by 30 points. Alex Flanagan is like a hashtag, without the asht. She offers nothing really to society. I ONLY set up my twitter account so that I could tweet her that she sucked. I then morphed it into my current role.
This is the most jeckyl and hyde team ever
Sacking Alex Smith, throwing interceptions, stopping Jamaal Charles, allowing Donnie Avery to explode, beautiful pass-catches with Desean and Avant, targeting Riley Cooper about 20 times. Maybe they will be a juggernaut in the making, but they need some more cohesion and accountability on every side of the ball.
Uh. Mayock just said Niles Davis was "body beautiful"
Good "anal"ysis.
With that bright red shirt on i finally noticed Andy Reid wears fanny packs. But he wears them on his front butt.
Seriously, he may be winning right now, but that look is awful. I've heard the jokes on the radio calling him the Kool-Aid man. I think I had already wrote that the day it was announced he was going to Kansas City. If he was in Baltimore, it'd be all purple (Barney), Lions/Chargers/Seahawks/Giants (blueberry), Browns/Bengals (pumpkin), 49ers (strawberry), he would probably look a little better.
Dumby. It's Los Chiefs de Ciudad de Kansas
So glad NFL Network took the time to tell me it was Latin Heritage Month within the NFL. Since white people are the minority in football as well, how about a combined Asian/Caucasian Heritage Month? Just asking. We can highlight players like Tony Romo or Riley Cooper.
I say it every week. I love Avant
When the most crucial of 3rd down conversions was needed in the game, and Vick was getting pressured enough to maybe overshoot the ball by just a hair, Avant tipped it in the air to himself as he was falling to the ground diving for it. Awesome catch. Anybody remember that one handed overhead catch last year at Tampa? The dude makes at LEAST 3 amazing catches per year. And he caught a great touchdown later.
I still stand by my decision to bench the Chiefs Defense.
In hindsight, I am a jackass. 25 points sitting on my fantasy bench. Apparently the Thursday Night Football rule is still the same.
I'm pretty sure my grandma could bust through the chiefs line right now
She is 92(?) years old. At one point all three Eagles linemen got the jump and got through. They just couldn't stop the Eagles, and it was weird.
Andy has a good sense of humor.
He called timeout with just under 4 minutes in the half on like 2nd down and 9. The crowd went nuts when he did. Just kind of funny. But not as funny as what happened next...
Seriously, he called a timeout for that one yard run
A one yard run up the middle by Alex Smith. Ladies and Gentlemen, THAT's the Andy Reid people HATE in Philadelphia. I don't hate him. I don't like those moves.
What the hellConnor Barwin
I missed the space bar on this one. Just like Connor Barwin missed the ball carrier as he decided to flop to the ground while chasing I think Alex Smith.
Stop throwing to Cooper
He had caught nothing all night up to that point. The Hell this guy has put himself in must be unbearable.
If you think McCoy just breaking his leg was the end of the season, just remember we were 4-12 last year and everything is new this year and we play in the worst division in football.
It looked like McCoy was having his leg cut off while somebody raped his mother right over his head and the rape sweat was falling in his eyes. The crowd died. The team died. The announcers acted like THAT was the reason the Eagles won't succeed. No. But anything is possible. Eagles may still be first place in the division this weekend, with a losing record. If they truly make the playoffs, I would rather be with a just "win the division" mentality rather than a "let's blow everybody out" one. The way it looks, 5 wins could wrap this up for the division champion.
Thank you for the face emotion pouring details, Alex Flanagan.
The statue of a portrait of a copy of a picture of a woman, Alex Flanagan, told us she creepily stared down the tunnel while Lesean McCoy walked down to the locker room, then suddenly he bent over put his head in his hands and let the "emotions pour out of his face." He came back one quarter later and scored a touchdown. I call shenanigans on Alex Flanagan's reporting.
Poor McNabb is going to be booed as he retires. And thats the Eagles fault for the way they played
It would've been a crazy way to buttress his career - booed at the draft, booed at retirement. I'm sure he has true love for the city. He just sounds like a jackass sometimes when he speaks of himself. That has actually calmed down a little bit in recent years. People will hate on him forever, but seriously, the dude made me a fan. Good thing the crowd elicited Brian Dawkins to deliver the retirement party. But I was worried that the Eagles poor performance, and then the face of the franchise that couldn't win it all being in the same building at the same time, that it might get ugly.
How many blocks in the back can a referee allow? The Eagles are losing on their own, but it doesnt have to be this bad
A couple of the Chiefs' long gains on 3rd down had a lot of back-blocking. I'm pretty sure I don't coach that to my kids because it is illegal. And the refs saw it. I saw them see it. Perhaps the Eagles could've been in this one a little longer, or at least had some more offensive possession to make up for their own lost opportunities throughout the game.
Good for you, Donovan. I always thought you were a classy overachiever. Thanks for making me an Eagles fan for life. Fyi, my phone corrected Donovan to "Do no can"
I really did enjoy Donovan MacNabb's tenure with the Eagles. I developed my undying fandom under his reign while his ups and downs carried me through mine. Whatever his end result was, I lived life hard to hile he was here. I had something to cheer for. For that, I thank you.
So what we learned tonight is Lee an McCoy is a crybaby.
Seriously, McCoy acted like somebody snapped his leg in half and shoved it up his ass. Then he charges into the field and has a decent game. I wonder if that'sthe same reaction he had when his baby's mama called him out on Twitter?
Wow something might go the Eagles way right now. And by that I mean a reversed turnover.
It would be the best thing for them as a team that I had seen give up so many times last year that they know they are lucky to get a chance to keep trying to score.
Elbows out ball in sounds like a Saturday night for Mike Mayock
Analysis.
Are the Eagles trying to innovate on defense by implementing the new trip tackle?
It looked like they were throwing their bodies on the ground just to give the Chiefs an obstacle. That leads me to my next point...
I wonder of the chiefs will draw a penalty to make it third and long again
The chiefs struggled on third and short, most likely because the Eagles stopped the run MOST of the night, but dominated on third an 9+. It was like 3rd and 4 so the Chiefs could have converted probably after a false start. Turns out they got the first down anyways.
What a surprise, Riley Cooper's black teammates are not pleased
Seriously, he dropped or missed several chances. The cameras found obviously frustrated black players. One after another showed an apparent disgusted look that one of you people let them down.
Is anybody else on facebook right now?
I got several texts telling me I dominated their Facebook feeds and they were loving it.
This is the weirdest game I think I have ever seen.
The Eagles gave up so many points on the field and the Chiefs were playing like they only had five players on the field.
This is how I spend my time watching an Eagles game.
A lot of things get said during a football game with Brandon either on the other end of the phone or in the same room. A lot of gay jokes, a lot of meat and a lot or other inappropriateness.
I want to say the defense is keeping them in the game, but this game us horrible. This is like when Atlanta beat New Orleans 5-3 last year
This game was the epitome of why non-Thanksgiving thursday night football is horrible. Anybody who watched that game and said it was a great game is just an asshole and I don't trust you.
I'm sorry but if you are hurt you should be on the bench
It is suspicious when a player goes down after giving up two critical plays in a row. If you stop the game because of injury more than two times in a five minute span, perhaps you shouldn't be allowed in the game.
Seriously Andy Reid is begging the Eagles to take this game.
The coaching standard fans despised came out like he was teasing the philadelphia fans taunting them that their team and new regime couldn't take candy from a baby.
I honestly thought Mayock was on the other guys lap
They showed Mike Mayock and his announcing partner but i had to do like a quadruple take to make sure he wasn't actually sitting on that guys lap. He is a very small looking man too. He looked like that other announcer could have been using Mayock like a puppet.
Get another one, boys. You don't stop till the last whistle.
I always think until the last whistle has blown, you always have a chance to win.
I've seen this show before. The ending better be different, or else twenty people will see how mad I am about it tomorrow
Well, it isn't the day after, but I'm sure twenty people came looking for this column. The ending was the same - disappointment. Disappointment is worse and different than heartbreak. Heartbreak is having the hope and dreams dashed. Disappointment is getting the same shit on a different day after the heartbreak.
Can't you just stop a team one time?
Jamaal Charles had just scored a touchdown, I believe. And the game was essentially all but comoleted.
"False start...Everybody but the center" Honestly?
Seriously. One great half against the terrible redskins doesn't mask they are an awful team from last year. And no, Mike Mayock, the Eagles defense did not play well b that was pathetic. The franchise QB is not on the roster yet, and some of these primadonas have to suck it up and not expect to win.
Defense had half the calls right. But all the calls must be right to win a game. Also, the offense looks like they can't keep up with the plan, either.
Well, ten days to lament a loss isn't as bed as two weeks. Or 7 months
Or an entire year. Remember. When the Lions went almost two full years without a win? imagine being a Jaguars fan this year. At least people want to see the Eagles this year. I will root every week. 6-10 could win the division. I just want more wins than losses at some point.
No comments:
Post a Comment