Courtesy of NYdailynews.comBecause the Eagles stopped playing on January 1, 2012
Because there is no more new football coming up. Yes, the Combine shows up, but I don't have the NFL Network and can only watch old stuff or ESPN highlights at Brandon's house.
So, I guess, there was a Superbowl last night. In hindsight, I can see that it was indeed a really great game. However, you have to hear the analysis from somebody who is NOT a Patriots, Giants, Eagles or Jets fan. Three sets of those fans were deeply pained while one set got justified. I have had a couple hours now between driving home, reading internet articles, and listening to different accounts.
The way the game started, I thought that Tom Brady was going to have a really bad game. I think he showed his age just a tad and that his arsenal (starting with his arm) is not what it used to be. I would by no means ever say that Brady sucks, as if he had the opportunity to come to the Eagles, why WOULDN'T I take it? I don't and won't ever think Elisha (pronounced Ah-lee-sha) is better than Brady. I still remember him as a guy who fell face first down to the ground while driving the Giants down the field two season's ago and fumbled the ball, sealing up an Eagles victory on Sunday Night Football at the Linc. And THAT guy gets to host his second Lombardi trophy, second MVP honor, and second parade. I digress...Brady's play was less than stellar in the opening drives of the game, ultimately leading to a safety which made me feel like this was going to be all Giants.
However, after being down 9-0, that Patriots stormed back and reclaimed the game by half-time, at 10-9. The Giants dominated probably the first 25 minutes of the game, but the five minutes towards the end the Patriots looked just like the Patriots. And the snozzberries tasted like snozzberries.
Before I knew it, the Patriots were up 17-9, and I was really hoping for the killshot from the Patriots. This game was so boring as a fan who had nothing to root for. By this point all I could hope for was the face falling version of Manning. However, with Rob Gronkowski injured he had minimal impact. This would've been the great opportunity to utilize Chad Ochocinco as he could have maybe added some new wrinkle as you can expect the Patriots to do when they have their foot on the gas. Alas, nothing. They let the Giants hang in there, chipping away field goal after field goal.
And then, this happened...
(courtesy NYdailynews.com)
This picture so delicately, figuratively displays Ahmad Bradshaw taking a dump on the Patriots and all other Giant-hating fans. I understood what he did and why he should have done it. I guess you do NOT give up the chance at Superbowl immortality. This was the most anti-climactic, embarrassing game-winning touchdown of aaaalllllll time. If a game winning homerun in baseball is a "walk-off," then the game winning touchdown in a Superbowl is the "sit-down".
Entertainment value - I did not enjoy this game like I did the previous Superbowl between these teams, but I have mentioned it before. There was nothing special, unless you are a Giants fan or Eli fan. He won his team that game. And as a disgruntled Philadelphia fan, this game gets only a 2.5 out of 10. One point for some of the nice hits and the fact that Danny Woodhead would've been the Patriots MVP if the outcome was different and another 1.5 points for the invisible man taking out Jake Ballard both on the field (0.5 point awarded) and off the field (a full 1.0 point for his sprint/fall/trainer easing him to the ground by his shirt video). Also, when they had a Superbowl-outside-the-stadium-camera shot through the fish-eye lens, a mulleted man smoking a cigarette for one brief second had me and Nick Scalise laughing for almost 10 minutes. That was way more entertaining than...
Commercials - Horrible. Not one really good commercial. The Dorritos dog that burried that cat and bribed his owner with a bag of chips was good. The movie commercials were good, but I have already seen most of them after having just seen Chronicle in the theater. Careerbuilder's monkeys had me going a little bit, as cheap monkey jokes get me laughing. I am very sick and tired of godaddy.com commercials. They are stupid with absolutely nothing to do with their product except to promote yet another crappier version of their commercial on their website. If you are an 11 year old boy whose parents put restrictions on your computer, than this was the commercial for you. Overall, 3 points out of 10 for the commercials (as they had more of my interest than the game at times).
Half-Time - As a football fan, I get the spectacle of the 30 minute extravaganza. As a man, I don't think Madonna could ever do anything to excite me. There was some highwire flippy guy that was pretty impressive and the appearance of the Party Rock Anthem Guys was great. I don't listen to or like dance music (or rap for that matter) but those guys are fantastic. Cee-Lo Green came out looking like a glittery turtle, really singing his part in the song and thus forcing Madonna to sing her song as well. It was weak, and had less of a purpose than last year's show by the Black Eyed Peas. If you are not better to me than the Black Eyed Peas, then you are nothing anymore in my book. Therefore, this year's Superbowl halftime show gets a 1 out of 10. One point awarded for ending.
Commentators - I like Al Michaels, but I do not like Chris Collinsworth. I had trouble hearing the game until they turned the volume up a little at Brandon's, but once they did, I realized I did not like too much of what I heard. It was more of "this is what's great about Eli and/or Tom Brady and/or Bill Belichek" than some actual play calling. I like emotional calls of the game but not two guys talking like my friends and I would be talking to each other at home about the game. There were very few funny lines (as football tends to have some funny analysis). I only heard one instance of "gaping hole" and a couple funny uses of the word sack (for example, "Tom Brady hit his head hard on that sack"). Had it been one different team, at least we would have had some real analysis of the game. Made me long for John Madden. Because it was not too bad, I give them a 5 out of 10.
Overall, I gave this Superbowl an 11.5 out of 40. I would try to keep coming up with categories to review the Superbowl, but I fear it would take its average score down. Therefore, no mas.
That concludes another NFL season without anybody talking about the Eagles, except for the "I wish we had XYZ player" fans who are probably calling in to the radio right now.
This day has always been tough for me, and I am sure I will receive the text soon from Brandon saying "I can't believe there's no more football" any minute now. The horribleness of this day is just ampliefied by the fact the Giants, under Elisha Nelson Manning, are two time Superbowl champs. They were swept by the Redskins. And they are our champs.
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