Let me first start out by saying I love a gay joke, insinuating somebody is gay, or calling myself gay for doing something, well, gay. I by no means mean it to be that gays are lesser than straight people. I think a person who has a problem with gay people would say the previous sentence like this - "I by no means mean it to be that gays are lesser than NORMAL people." To me, a person who is "normal" is somebody that respects others and always tries to do their best by doing what's best for other people. There are certainly some evil hearted gay people and definitely a littany of evil hearted straight people.
Do I have many gay friends? Not really. But I do know some people who I used to go to school with back in the 90's (God I'm getting old). I remember being a dick at times to these kids. If I grew up now, I would certainly have not had to ever make a joke or get a laugh at somebody else's expense of being gay. As an adult, I realize a gay person is a person. Just like any other person. Yet others want to hold that feeling down for some reason. It, to me, is like the last thing that the type of people who unwillingly let black people prosper have left to hold on to. Some people just want to have something to hang over their head. There are some people who want to still feel superior over others, and gays are the last group left to pick on.
This, to me, is evident in the Boy Scouts of America. I am a volunteer at my local Cub Scout pack for my son, and a couple months back the pastor running the church our group works out of sent an email saying that no matter what the national BSA vote was, they would accept openly gay scouts. But there would be a vote. I just don't understand how you could want to be involved in bettering the lives of kids who can go on to better society yet want to deny a kid that ability. To me, if you voted against it, I don't want you to be there to influence my kid. My son is 7. What if he is gay? He is too young to know or understand that. I would hope that for his life to be easier, he wasn't gay, but if he is, well, I will make it my mission to ensure he is treated as "normal" as can be. Scratch my last sentiment, when I see "I hope he isn't gay" I realize how polarizing of a statement that still is. Kim and I have discussed this at length, and it is whatever. As long as we have made him happy as a child to become a great person and contributor as an adult, we did our job.
The vote in the BSA came up as other gay rights issues have come to light in recent years. One old man who I looked up to at the Cub Scouts said they should have their own group. I find myself to be a manly man, as is this old man, but seriously? It's hard to even say the standard line "I respect your opinion and your right to it, but I don't agree." No, I don't respect that opinion. He was upset he had to explain to his scout what being gay meant. I can only imagine that conversation. It is as simple as saying to my son, "You know how I love Mommy? Well, some boys love other boys. It is all about who makes you happiest in life. But you are too young to even think about these things, so don't sweat it."
Our local group's vote on accepting gay scouts was based on a boy who wants to be a girl. The boy is maybe 8 or 9 years old, but I swear I always thought he was a girl. I have mixed feelings about this, but I am in no way eligible to critique the parents. It is weird. Rocco always asked me why a girl was in the boy scouts. It makes sense, if he thinks he is a girl, biologically he is a boy, and has no place in the Girl Scouts. As I got to know this boy a little better, he is a good kid. Whoever can label a kid as somebody they don't want in their group because of who they are is a disgusting person in my book. I hate that I lost a little bit of respect for my old man guidance counselor.
So why do I have mixed feelings about this boy who wants to be a girl? It is just weird for me to imagine making it okay for my son to have a harder life than he deserves. In this age where a kid's life can be ruined in 140 letters or less it is scary. How many kids needlessly committed suicide when the going got tough because the whole world ganged up on them? But then again, I imagine it must be a burden that family tries to deal with the best they can, and they certainly appear to be very supportive of their son. Maybe I still have a lot to learn. But I want to.
I wish I could personnally apologize to anybody I ever teased or added on to about being gay, whether they were or not. Recent years of television has certainly opened up the world (or at least America) to the fact that gay people exist, and they are never going away. It opened our eyes to their struggles, which I could never imagine. It is not right to get beat up for being a "nerd" but imagine being beat up because you have feelings for somebody nobody else does? It is crazy.
But Duba, what about allowing gays to get married? Then aren't we opening the door for people who love animals to marry animals? Marriage is between a man and a woman, not a man and a man, NOR a man and a horse!
Seriously? I have heard this argument. So what...all men (and women) are created equal, right? Don't we thank soldiers we don't know every single day for serving across the world for protecting our freedom? And some of these soldiers fall within that same group that you think shouldn't be allowed to wed. If they can die for you, let them marry their beloved. Marriage is a legal declaration with religious tones. There are beliefs in marriage about religious principles, but the legal side allows for beneficiary activities between spouses. Your church doesn't have to house the gay marriage, which I guess is a legal thing. The legal system shouldn't put their stronghold on the church (unless definite harm is caused to individuals) and the church needs to stay the fuck out of the court house. Okay so God doesn't want Adam and Steve to get married. Judge Soandso doesn't want to see it either, but he has to allow it. If you are a strongly religious person, than let those "sinners" be and know they will have to answer to your God who wants you to spread His word through your actions. I'm sure your actions shouldn't be surpressing your fellow man (or woman).
No real way to end this, but just end the charade already. People are people. That's my vote. The tags to this column will be taken from the first Google search result of "Gayest songs ever."
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